Denseotus: Hey Beatrix, can you type up this document here, fax it to this number, and send me an e-mail when it’s done?
Beatrix Kiddo: Sure. I’ll have it ready in a jiffy (Oh, who am I kidding? My replies are never ever this civilized, not to Denseotus anyway; so it was more like “Whatever” - loud […]
Desperate Baker: Um, yes, I’m calling regarding your order for a birthday cake…
Beatrix Kiddo: Oh yes. It should have been here 2 hours ago…
DB: Well, we’ve baked three different cakes for you guys. But for some strange reason, every time we pull them out of the oven, they deflate!
BK: (oh no, not the curse of Twathead Ventures) […]
Her Cuntness: Hi Beaaatrixxx (oh no, not the Southern drawl, y’all)
Beatrix Kiddo: Hey
HC: So I had a minor car accident this weekend…
BK: (Again?! What’s that? The seventh time this year?) Oh, what happened?
HC: I was like driving down the freeway and then all of a sudden I was in the lane for oncoming traffic and then […]
Being an EA in venture capital is like being the protagonist of Hostel. Fine, you made it out alive, and you may have even kicked some ass, but you’re still missing an eye, your left arm, an ass cheek, and a quarter of your bowels.
That said, I’ll gladly go through three sessions of painful torture […]
Idiotus has been going through a mid life crisis for the past, err, forty years.
As part of his continued commitment to reject aging gracefully, he has made it a habit to always be “in the know” of hip and young things. Like listening to the ghettoest rap, getting an Xbox along with the ubiquitous Dance Dance […]
Dear God,
I want to believe in you and your miraculous powers, I really do. Living in this country, I can’t help but notice that a whole bunch of people think you are “the shit,” hearing or reading about your divine nature and limitless compassion for as long as I can remember.
You turned water into wine, healed lepers, […]